04 April 2010

A TOUR OF THE BEST AND THE BRIGHTEST

Hi, it's just me again. On a daily basis, I listen to Opie and Anthony. They are a radio show out of NYC for those of you who don't know. They are funny as hell, to me anyway and I have listened to them for years. The one underlying theme that I notice with them and the guests they have on that are also NYC residents to a man, think that they and their city is the most wonderful place with the smartest most enlightened people in the universe dwelling there.

These are people who are taxed on everything that they say, do, or use. They pay ten to twenty dollar tolls on tunnels and bridges to travel around their wonderful city daily. Their parking tickets amount to hundreds of dollars and their mayor is a retarded billionaire who just purchases his position every election.

They can do nothing unless they first give money to get a permit for doing it. It is almost impossible to have a firearm to protect yourself with, in a city teaming with rapists, murderers, purse snatchers and muggers! This is a city full of the smartest people in the world, according to them.

This city, full of the most enlightened, smartest people in the world is so far in debt that it can't even pay it's smart and enlightened residents their income tax refunds. What a wonderful place to live!

Also, according to themselves of course. They are the toughest, bravest people. Also world wide. I do kind of remember how brave and tough they were acting when they were covered with cement dust running through the streets flapping their arms and screeching like little girls on September eleventh.

So there you go. A utopia for the brightest, the bravest, and the most enlightened people of the world. It kind of makes you wish that you could be a part of it, doesn't it?

Next, we have Washington D.C. Another bastion of smart, brave, and enlightened people. Another utopia where everyone considers themselves smarter and braver than the rest of us country bumpkins living throughout the land.

The leaders of the free world are there. Making laws and enforcing the little people's subjugation on a daily basis. They sit around patting each other on the back and telling themselves how wonderfully clever and forward thinking they are.

This is all going on in the murder capitol of the United States. Another place that personal weapons are almost impossible to own. Where rape and robbery abound. Where over half of the residents are infested with AIDS. Oh... these most intelligent and liberal thinkers are just the cat's meow. Everyone should be drooling to dwell in their midst. Another metropolis that is and has been bankrupt for years.

Then, there is Chicago. With the most corrupt political system in the country. Where our current president was groomed to maturity. Where mobsters, drugs, and illegal prostitution and gambling are everywhere.

Another place where the residents consider themselves smarter and more enlightened than normal folks. Another city that is bankrupt and has one of the highest violent crime rates in the country. Also, another place where personal protection is not allowed. These people are too smart to need it, I guess.

Another place where even a person with only a pea sized brain should be aching to live. I mean, these huge cities are just filled with the intelligencia of the country. You can tell by their resumes and bank books just how smart and wonderful the people that live there are.

Then, last, but surely not least, we have a whole state. Just chucked full of the bravest and smartest people that God ever wobbled guts in. A state where the people are sooo smart, sooo enlightened, sooo compassionate, and sooo wonderful. A place where everyone should just be stampeding to go live..... California! As if you even needed to be told.

A living utopia right out of the sixties. Where everyone is welcome with opened arms. Where it makes no matter if you have AIDS, no one cares if you are a queer, and if you happen to be one of several million illegal aliens from south of the border..... Welcome! Welcome! Welcome! Everyone has to learn Mexican so you will feel at home!

A state that is sooo bankrupt that it owes as much money as the other forty-nine states put together. This is the birth mother of ninety percent of the stupid ideas and regulations that plague the rest of the country. The people are sooo smart here. Some firearms are prohibited statewide. Yet illegal Mexicans and gangs and corruption abound. It has the oh so wonderful Los Angeles! And the stunning, queer ridden Gay Bay! What's not to love about this place where the average IQ is astronomical? According to them anyway.

I hope that you have enjoyed this little tour of the United States where the smartest, most enlightened people dwell. Maybe now you can relocate and no longer have to live among us dumb assed, debt free, racist, red necks.

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